Even If i Walk Alone

Instructing and encouraging you to live your life as a disciple of Jesus

Love Is… Forgiveness

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Recently we’ve been looking at the various attributes that make up the concept of living in love, deconstructing what it looks like to demonstrate Christ-like love to others. We previously looked at kindness and patience, and today I’d like to discuss one of the most difficult attributes: forgiveness. In addition to being the foundation for our salvation, Scripture is replete with references commanding us to be a forgiving. In I Corinthians 13:5, it says that love keeps no record of wrongs. In other words, love is forgiving; it does not hold past offenses against another. Ephesians 4:32 tells us to forgive one another, just as Christ forgave us. If we want to live lives that look like Jesus, we must be forgiving people. Why then is it so difficult to do so, and what would it look like if we would truly model Christ’s forgiveness in our own lives?

To ask forgiveness of someone else means we must admit that we are sorry for behaving in the way we did towards them. If we are prideful, we will resent the insinuation that we are in the wrong. Pride often leads to anger, and anger to bitterness. Once we reach this stage, forgiveness can indeed be very hard to achieve. You don’t feel like humbling yourself and the other party now wants nothing to do with you. That’s why it is vital to heed the instruction in Ephesians 4:26 to not let the sun go down on your anger. Don’t let the day end with anger in your heart or it will fester all night, robbing you of sleep and depriving you of joy when you awaken. If you have wronged someone, seek forgiveness immediately. It is uncomfortable to do so, but it is far more difficult later. By remaining conscious of your words and actions, you can begin by asking forgiveness for small things. This will be easier and it will begin to develop the habit of forgiveness in your life. If you feel anger, make sure it doesn’t set up shop in your heart. Dispense of it immediately; nothing soothes anger quicker than forgiving someone of their trespass, even if they deliberately hurt you and refuse to apologize. You have no control over the actions of others, but you have full charge over your own reaction. Choosing to forgive disperses tension and anger, and allows you live a less stressful life.

If we are the ones who have been offended and now seek the forgiveness of someone else, we probably are hurt and retain some resentment against them until they apologize. Sometimes someone forgives us and we accept ever so gently by telling ourselves (or the other person!) that we forgive them, but we’ll never forget. That’s not forgiveness; that’s merely glossing over the problem and allowing it to be a problem in the future. When someone asks our forgiveness, we are to accept it and move on. We can no longer harbor animosity toward them; it is up to us to open our clenched fists and lay our hurt down at the feet of Jesus. He will take it from us, allowing us to move on unencumbered by the burden of malice. Always accept forgiveness from someone; doing so will benefit you both and allow your relationship to grow.

Anger is the opposite of love; therefore you cannot live in love and be angry at the same time. Ask God to take away your anger so you can begin living in love. Don’t be afraid to take the initiative in forgiving someone even if they don’t deserve it. You don’t deserve to be forgiven either, but Christ did it anyway. When someone asks you to forgive them, have the grace to do so. Jesus said we were to repeatedly forgive others (Matthew 18:21-22). Remember Christ placed no limits on His forgiveness, so neither should we. Begin by asking for forgiveness in the small things until you’ve developed the proper habit and spirit. Nothing reflects Christ more vividly than a forgiving heart. Asking for forgiveness demonstrates humility and gentleness. Giving forgiveness shows mercy and consideration. Taken together you can easily see how love is indeed forgiveness. A heart that practices forgiveness is a heart that Jesus can use to change the world. Forgive others as Christ forgave you; confess your shortcomings to those you have hurt. Live in love.

The Mission of the Church

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As time runs out on the year 2010, it makes me ponder how much more time we have left on this planet. As the morality and economy of the United States spirals downward, I wonder also how much longer we have left for this country. I think America has been given the opportunity and blessed with the resources to significantly impact the world for Jesus Christ. In fact I think the record shows that we have made tremendous strides in spreading the gospel throughout the nations. However, given the level of wealth with which we have to work, I have to wonder if we have not fallen woefully short of our mission. Today it seems we have become content with building ever bigger buildings and feeding infinitely expanding programs to attract more and more people inside the walls of the church. We appear to be more concerned with building up walls instead of tearing them down. The good that the American church has done around the world is clearly documented; the generosity it has shared is without question. Still, by most estimates more than two billion people have never heard the name of Jesus.

I understand that church programs are designed to equip believers and children’s ministries are designed to develop the next generation of disciples. I get that, and I am not saying that these things are without merit. However I think it is vital that we examine the mission of each program and the necessity of each building. Despite all of our somewhat grandiose efforts, the church in America is in decline; the church in England has all but disappeared. Meanwhile African and Chinese house churches are growing at incredible rates. This is being accomplished with little or no money; the costs they contend with are persecution, torture and death. So how well are those billions of dollars we pour into concrete and mortar working?

I had lunch with a friend recently who disagreed, saying we need the buildings to accommodate new believers so the church can expand and we can do more good in our communities. I understand his point of view and recognize there is some truth there. I do question how it relates to the Biblical model of the early church. Without a single program or formal building, the church in the book of Acts added new members daily simply by living out the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Are we more interested in people coming to know Jesus or adding to our attendance rolls? Let me say this again; there are two billion people on the planet that have never heard the name of Jesus. Christ said that He will not return until all peoples had been given the opportunity to hear His message. Taking the message of Jesus to the unreached people-groups in the world will not be accomplished by spending millions of dollars on building some new walls for our Western churches; it will not be accomplished by providing more comfortable Sunday school classrooms for our preschoolers or constructing cool hangouts for our teens. The only way to touch the lives of the unreached is to move outside of the very walls we are constructing. If we won’t go to them, then I ask you, who will?

How are we doing as a body? We are all part of the Church; we are the called of God. Are we contributing to the expansion of buildings or the expansion of the Word? Are we teaching how best to serve Jesus in the context of the American dream or are we teaching how to engage the world with the love of Christ? Before we lay another brick or design another program, I believe it is vital to consider every expense of the time and money we have been entrusted to spend. Are we building the Kingdom of God or simply building an empire? The longer there remain those who have never heard about Christ, the longer we delay His coming. The final command given to us by Jesus was to take His message to all people. Let’s move out from behind the walls of our buildings and take His message to the world. This is His mission; this is our mission.

Becoming Who You Were Created to Be

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As we stare down the end of the year, it’s worth reflecting on how we’ve grown over the past eleven months. Are we becoming the person we were intended to be? In what ways have we noticed a maturing in our faith and in our love for God? We should never stop growing, never stop striving to become more and more like Jesus. If this past year didn’t bring the growth we expected or the maturity we desired, now is a great time to start figuring out how to have better results next year.

Goal setting has long been a tenant of the personal development crowd, but I think it also serves Christ followers well to set some goals in their spiritual life. Who were you created to be? What were you created to do? What is the difference between the answers to those questions and where you now find yourself? This is an excellent first step in setting some goals. If you were to be all that Christ intended you to be, what kind of person would you have to become? In what sort of activities would you engage? What kind of books would you read and what sort of words would you speak? Before you can become the person you were created to be, you need a clear picture of what that person looks like. Once you have that picture you can set goals that will mold your personality into the proper character. Becoming who God purposed you to be will usually not be an overnight transformation. In most cases, it will be a process of single steps compounded over time.

After getting clear about the kind of person you must become, the next step is to understand what actions you were created to accomplish. What sort of skills and talents do you possess? Are you an artist, a caregiver, a compassionate person, a good listener, a strong leader or patient teacher? This is a very short piece of an almost infinite list of gifts and capabilities. What is it that you are really good at, what attributes and abilities have you been given? If you are not currently making use of the talents God has entrusted to you, this is another great place to come up with some goals. What could you do next year that you have neglected to do this year? How could you make better use of your skills and expertise? If you are currently using your gifts for causes other than to further the Kingdom, in what ways could you begin to transition your work into something that reflects and honors God? What is it you have been putting off and can now determine to take action upon in the coming year? Don’t take the time to edit, but rather write down everything that comes to mind.

Once you have listed all the ways you can utilize your abilities for Christ, it’s time to whittle the list down into perhaps twelve specific goals (one for each month) for the new year. Compare your list with the picture of the person you wish to become. What items on your list would that person undertake? Picture yourself as the person God intended you to be and choose goals that you can envision that person achieving. Write everything down. Written goals are powerfully motivating. You can reference them regularly to remind yourself what you have determined to do. Make sure you review them no less than once every week. Commit your goals to memory; post them on your bathroom mirror or on the dashboard of your car, anywhere you will frequently see them and be reminded of the person you are becoming.

By visualizing the person you were created to become in Christ and carefully determining specific, measurable goals for your journey, you will be well on your way to exponential growth in the coming year. All of this must be done with a heavy dose of prayer. Ask God to show you who He wants you to become. Seek His wisdom in determining what He would have you to do. Knowing that He will provide the power behind our meager offerings is an invigorating and motivating force. We can become the person He sees in us; we can accomplish great work for His Kingdom. Don’t let another year go by without the growth that you desire. Tell God that this year you are going “all in”, and diligently follow your plan to do so. Take the time to set your spiritual goals now. Persist in achieving each of your goals. God delights in those who seek Him and He will help you every step of the way.

Love is… Patience

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Last week we looked at I Corinthians 13:4 in our discussion of kindness as it relates to love (See “Love is… Kindness”). The beginning of that verse says that “love is patient”. I must confess that I am not a patient person. Perhaps that’s why I jumped over the first part of the verse to get to the next! A lack of patience is one of my glaring weaknesses. Sure, I’ve gotten better over the years putting a more pleasant outward face on it, but inwardly I still struggle greatly with showing patience to those around me. My personality type is not known for patience, but I refuse to accept that and use it as an excuse. If I am going to love as Christ loves, then I must learn to increase my patience. Some of you are way ahead of me in this area while others, I’m sure, can relate to my pain.

One of the keys to being patient is learning to be a good listener. Instead of immediately flying off the handle when someone upsets us, we need to learn to pause and listen to what the other person is saying. Ask constructive questions to find out why the person acted (or didn’t act) in the way they did. Too often, I fail to seek to understand why someone failed to accomplish what they told me they were going to do. When someone is two minutes late for a meeting, I start pacing and checking my watch in an agitated fashion. It can be little things that really are of no consequence in the grand scheme of life, yet it is easy to lose our patience. One of the great truths in life is that people are going to let you down. The key is to seek out the circumstances and respond in a positive manner.

Even when we may be justified for losing our patience, it is still up to us to decide how we will respond. When we react with angry or spiteful words, we are damaging our relationship with the other person. It is far more desirable to listen to what they have to say and then respond with words that will not harm your rapport. Remember Paul’s admonishment in Ephesians 4:2, 3. In these verses Paul exhorts us to be patient with one another and to diligently keep unity (or peace). Harsh words show a lack of patience and lead to anything but peace or unity in our relationships.

As a volunteer financial counselor and life coach, I have endured more than my share of disappointment with the actions of those who come seeking assistance. It is far easier to simply lose patience and throw my hands up than it is to recognize that each person I encounter is a highly valued and loved creation of God who is free to make their own choices based on the circumstances of their own life and experience. We cannot control the choices of others or how they behave, but we can control our response to them. No matter how many times they disappoint us or act in ways which we do not approve, if our love for them is genuine, we will patiently accept what has happened and move on. It’s okay to let them know how their actions made you feel, just make certain you conclude it by affirming them and telling them you just want to put it behind you so it does not hinder your relationship. Showing patience is difficult because the returns on your investment may never come. Love, however, never fails; so neither must our patience wane.

Jesus shows infinite patience with a creation that continuously rejects Him, curses Him and laughs in His face. Through it all He loves us beyond measure. This is how I know patience is an important part of what it means to love. My heart’s desire is to live my life in a way that reflects the love of Jesus to everyone I meet. If I am to demonstrate His love then I must learn to be patient with anyone, regardless of my own feelings or frustrations. I want to love as Jesus loves, so I will choose to be patient. Love is patient, and love is kind. Love is Jesus.

The End of Indecision

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For too long we have gone back and forth about our commitment to Christ. One day we are fired up and nothing can deter us; the next we are self-absorbed, depressed and wondering if it’s all worth it. The inconsistency is killing our effectiveness and causing our lives to spoil. A mixture of hot and cold produces a lukewarm life, a life that Jesus said He will vomit out (Revelation 3:16). I believe I speak for all of us when I say that this is not the person I wish to be; I do not want to live a life so repulsive to Christ that He vomits it out. It’s time to decide, once and for all, where we will place our loyalties. Will we reach for all this life has to offer or will we place everything we have at the feet of the one who gave His life for us?

When we first committed our lives to Jesus we gave no thought to turning back. We understood we were new creations and therefore had been transformed to live differently. Over time we lose our enthusiasm; we allow our clean hearts to be polluted by the sin around us when we drink a little in. It’s not that we intend to turn away; we simply get lazy and let down our guard. We lose sight of the fact that there is a very real, very powerful battle waging for our soul. As physical beings we cannot see the battle, but our spiritual core can feel it. When we tune into the fray, we become aware of the ferocity and we determine anew to stand fast. Too often we live our lives tuned out, concerned only with the tactile realities of the here and now. We get caught up pursuing the American dream, and we succumb to the bombardment of messages from the media. We allow ourselves to drink in the dirty water.

The only way to remain vigilant is to consistently flush our souls with the pure living water of Christ. If we are not spending consistent time in prayer and studying His Word, we will become tainted and our effectiveness will be severely muted. I want my life to shout the love of Christ; I want to shake the world with His love and His message. The only way to accomplish these goals is to remain on purpose and on mission, all the time. An intentional, consistent walk is the only way that leads to victory. Remember the story of the tortoise and the hare? It wasn’t the brilliant bursts of the rabbit that won the race; he got lazy and caught up in his own selfish desires. No, it was the consistency and single-minded purpose of the tortoise that won the race. It is the same in our pursuit of Jesus. If we stay the course and keep our eyes focused on Him, we will accomplish what He has given us to do. Keeping our entire aim on His service while refusing to be distracted by the pleasures of this life will allow us to continue His mission and finish the race for His glory.

As long as we are given to a series of starts and stops, we will not be able to fulfill the purpose for which we were created. A lukewarm life will not get it done, and indeed may end with disastrous consequences. I don’t know how you read it, but being vomited out does not exactly sound like a grand welcoming into Heaven. Jesus calls us to total commitment, and that is exactly what we promised Him when we first surrendered our lives. We promised total devotion; we said that He would be our Lord and we would be His servant. This is not a casual vow; nothing could be more serious. Are we sincere or not? Do we love Him or are we just trying things out? It’s time to put away our indecision and once and for all give the rest of our lives to Christ and Christ alone. As Michael Tait sings in a recent Newsboys song, “I’m giving Him the best of/ Everything that’s left of/ The life inside this man/ I’ve been born again!” Let’s join in that pledge. Let’s give Jesus all we have for the rest of our lives. From this point forward our decision is clear and our path is focused. Let’s pledge to follow Jesus wherever that may lead. No more wavering, no more turning back.